My favorite licenses

I just had a great idea while thinking about licenses (a common hobby of mine). A good license is ISC, but you know what would make it better? Herman Melville's classic novel Moby-Dick included at the end.

What results is possibly the longest open source license ever written. It weighs in at 222,573 words—the plain text license file takes up 1.2 megabytes of disk space!

For ... web reasons, I'm not going to include the entire Moby-Dick ISC license on this page. You can read the full license here!

This is the license for the Go monkey-patching library.

Copyright AUTHOR

I do not give anyone permissions to use this tool for any purpose. Don't use it. I’m not interested in changing this license. Please don’t ask.

This license is a modified WTFPL with some political limitations. Written by my friend, anelki.

anelki Public License

v. 1.5 (2022-12-20)

This license text is in the public domain under the terms of the Creative Commons Zero (CC0) License.

Everyone is permitted to copy and distribute verbatim or modified copies of this license document. You must change the name if you make modifications.

ANELKI PUBLIC LICENSE TERMS AND CONDITIONS FOR COPYING, DISTRIBUTION AND MODIFICATION

0. You just DO WHAT THE FUCK YOU WANT TO
   (with the following limitations):
   1. You may not use it for commercial purposes
   2. You may not use it to advance the police state
   3. You may not use it if you're a fascist or a tankie
   4. You may not use it for evil
1. In all cases shall the judgement of the originating author be determinative on any moral or ethical questions from the above provisions.

"FML" Clause

2. Under no circumstances may this code be used for purposes of training "machine learning", "artifical intelligence", or any other computer learning model. For example, this code may not be used by GitHub's "Pilot" service.

I don't know where this one is from, but it's pretty incredible!

BIG BILL HELL'S LICENSE

FUCK YOU, OPEN-SOURCE!

If you're dumb enough to want to copy this software, you're a big enough schmuck to abide by BIG BILL HELL'S LICENSE (BBHL):

1. BAD TERMS
2. CODE THAT BREAKS DOWN
3. THIEVES

1. BAD TERMS

If you think you're going to find permissive terms in BIG BILL'S, you can kiss my ASS. It's our belief that you're such a stupid motherfucker, you'll depend on this bullshit, GUARANTEED. If you make a derivative work: Shove it up your ugly ASS. You heard us right: Shove it up your ugly ASS.

2. CODE THAT BREAKS DOWN

Bring your CHANGE; bring your REPRO; bring your SPOUSE--we'll fuck them! That's right, we'll fuck your SPOUSE. Because under the BBHL, you're fucked six ways from Sunday.

3. THIEVES

Make a hack with BBHL, home of CHALLENGE GITTING. That's right:

3.a. CHALLENGE GITTING

How does it work? If you submit six PRs straight into main that don't need feedback, you get no Contributor License Agreement (CLA).

---

DON'T SELL; DON'T DISTRIBUTE; DON'T FORK FROM US, OR WE'LL RIP YOUR BITS OFF.

ONLY WITH BBHL: THE ONLY LICENSE THAT TELLS YOU TO FUCK OFF.

HURRY UP, ASSHOLE, THESE TERMS TAKE EFFECT THE MINUTE YOU WRITE A LINE OF CODE, AND IT BETTER NOT BREAK, OR YOU'RE A DEAD MOTHERFUCKER.

GO TO HELL. BIG BILL HELL'S LICENSE: OPEN-SOURCE'S FILTHIEST AND EXCLUSIVE TERMS OF THE MEANEST (SONS OF) BITCHES IN THE WHOLE COMMUNITY, GUARANTEED.

The license for a fun IRC bot called Edward, by a friend of mine.

Copyright (c) YEAR AUTHOR

Redistribution and use in source and binary forms, with or without modification, are permitted provided that the following conditions are met:

1. Redistributions of source code must retain the above copyright notice, this list of conditions and the following disclaimer.
2. Redistributions in binary form must reproduce the above copyright notice, this list of conditions and the following disclaimer in the documentation and/or other materials provided with the distribution.
3. The name of the author may not be used to endorse or promote products derived from this software without specific prior written permission.
4. The girlfriend of the author must give the author a peck on the cheek. If such a peck is not possible, the girlfriend must send the author a funny little message on the Internet.

THIS SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED BY THE AUTHOR ``AS IS'' AND ANY EXPRESS OR IMPLIED WARRANTIES, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY AND FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE ARE DISCLAIMED. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE AUTHOR BE LIABLE FOR ANY DIRECT, INDIRECT, INCIDENTAL, SPECIAL, EXEMPLARY, OR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES (INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, PROCUREMENT OF SUBSTITUTE GOODS OR SERVICES; LOSS OF USE, DATA, OR PROFITS; OR BUSINESS INTERRUPTION) HOWEVER CAUSED AND ON ANY THEORY OF LIABILITY, WHETHER IN CONTRACT, STRICT LIABILITY, OR TORT (INCLUDING NEGLIGENCE OR OTHERWISE) ARISING IN ANY WAY OUT OF THE USE OF THIS SOFTWARE, EVEN IF ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGE.

From a discussion on #emacs.

Look at This Cool Rock I Found Public License Version 1.0

Copyright (C) YEAR NAME [email]

Redistribution and use in source and binary forms, with or without modification, are permitted provided that the following conditions are met:

You must agree to look at this cool rock I found. Images of the cool rock may be provided either as a URL or as an image in the source repository in JPEG or WEBP format. GIF files may also be provided, but only in addition to JPEG/WEBP. In the event that a URL is provided and the URL returns a 404 in the future, the user may, at their discretion, provide a backup cool rock to look at until such time as the URL is fixed.

This software is provided "as is" and any express or implied warranties are disclaimed, even if you do look at the rock.